Fake News and Stuff

Friday, June 23

Trump on Healthcare: 'We Covered Most of the Important People'

Cedar Rapids, IA: At a rally in Cedar Rapids today President Trump spoke to supporters regarding the Senate's newly draft healthcare bill. Trump was candid in his remarks and says that this bill will not only fix the issues with Obamacare, but will serve as springboard to bolster the economy.

"I told you I was going to raise the median income and cut the unemployment rate in half. This healthcare bill accomplishes that, and not just because all the poor people will be dead. It will also give enormous tax cuts to the rest of us. It's a win/win for America. But just wait, the liberal media is going to figure out a way to put a negative spin on it."

Trump says that, while this bill may offer fewer options to low income families, the available options will better serve them in the long run.

"Sure, most of you will lose your health insurance and probably die, but is that really the worst thing in the world? If I was that poor I'd be screaming for someone to put me out of my misery. Anyone making under $500,000 a year is just gross.Yuck! Even that is pushing it. I have a toilet that costs more than than a half million. Where do you people poop?"

Trump went on to say that even though he applauds the details of how the bill works, things might change depending on how things play out.

"Of course, if you are poor, and haven't died out by next election, you're probably one of the good ones. We'll take another look at it then."  

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